Thursday, October 13, 2011

Where does the time go?

Dear Life,
Please calm down a bit! I feel like I am running in circles and never have time to breathe anymore, let alone stop to smell the roses. I need to regroup a little bit before the craziness of the holidays really starts...

That pretty much sums up my life right now. Between work, tying up the loose ends for the reception, the events that have been planned for months that we are supposed to attend, Halloween...well you see my feelings above.

A weird thing happened today though that got me to slow down. Well, two things really… The first was talking to an old friend from HS on Facebook. The second was talking to a friend that has had their world turned upside down, no fault of their own. Both of these things happened within an hour of each other and it made me think about my past and how I am not really able to enjoy the present because I am always worrying about my future. Problem is…what if my future crumbles? Then I am left wishing I had slowed down a bit to enjoy things while they happened…
So the backstory with my first of 2 “ah ha” moments came from sending a message to an old friend. I will call her Ann. My high school days were mainly filled spending time with Ann and another friend (aka Faye). We did everything together. Literally everything. We were so close that my mom called us the “Three Musketeers.” In high school our group had a bet to see who would get married first and who would have a kid first…and one didn’t have to follow the other either. Funny thing was we said that Ann would be the first for both. She was/is a serial monogamist. Now, it’s been almost 10 years since we graduated and she isn’t married, no kids, no house…etc. She pointed out today that we all thought she would be the first for everything, and yet she is the last. Granted, I am not far in front of her…
Now Faye has been married for 5 ½ years. Her and her hubby did it the smart way in my opinion. They got married young, so they have waited to have kids. They’ve traveled the world and enjoyed themselves. All of the initial problems that happen in every couple’s first few years of marriage have been dealt with and they are still going strong. I tell Michael all of the time how much I hope we are like them in 5 years!
Soooo, back to the point of why this was an “ah ha” moment for me. The three of us were so inseparable and somehow we’ve drifted apart. Now Faye and I are still very close considering we haven’t lived within 7 hours of each other since we were 20. Even then, we’ve gone long periods of time without speaking to each other because, well, life happened. Ann and I, well this is the first time we’ve “talked” (don’t know how much fb counts for talking) in probably 2 years. Funny thing is, Ann lives 20 minutes from where we grew up, so I am still down there often. How does this happen? These were girls that I couldn’t go 2 hours without talking to! I get that we’ve grown up, and that life changes and yada yada…but it’s just sad. I realized today how much I miss the three of us and how I don’t think I appreciated it as much as I should have when I had it. We always thought we’d have it…so why did we need to stop and smell the roses??
Now my second “ah ha” moment came from another friend of mine. I am not about to blast that friend’s personal business all over the internet, so I will make it short and vague. Went to bed happy, healthy, married and content with their life…woke up to a life that they didn’t recognize. This friend’s life was turned upside down. It made me realize that I don’t want to rush through my days anymore. I want to enjoy my life and enjoy being a newlywed. I mean we haven’t even been married 3 weeks and yet Michael and I haven’t even gone out to dinner. We haven’t gone to the movies. We haven’t even done our Saturday morning garage sale ritual (don’t hate…you know our garage sale routine is something to be jealous about! :))  I’ll put it to you like this…our house, for 2 years, has been the most decorated house on our block from September 30th-January 2/3. Today is October 13th and we have like 2 things put out.
Life is just flying by. Why can’t things, good things, just stay the same? Why do friendships have to die? Why do weekends have to come and go so quickly? Why, Why, Why?
I’ll end it with this…if we’ve ever been friends and life got in the way…well I WANT TO BE FRIENDS AGAIN! :)

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