Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Normal?

Link up with Allyce. All the cool kids are doing it. :)

1.
Is it normal to drive 5 mph over the speed limit? 10 mph?
Assuming you are on the freeway, it depends on what lane you are in. The far right lane is for the 65+ drivers that think 45 is the new 65. The far left lane is for those that plan on driving at least 80mph and just pray that they don't get pulled over. Now the middle lane is for those that plan on either going the speed limit or 5 miles over.
Basically, yes...it's normal. However, realize that when the lights start flashing behind you it is not a sign to drive faster.
2.
Is it normal to pick a wedgie in public?
Eww. I do not need to know that your panties are jammed up your rear. Please find a bathroom, or even a corner, to relieve the tension.

3.
Is it normal to put makeup on even if you aren't planning on leaving the house?
Yep. Who knows if someone will stop by or if you have to quickly leave the house for a while. I don't need to scare my neighbors...

4.
Is it normal to go skinny dipping?
If you are in the privacy of your own backyard or a remote lake...yes. If you are in a public pool I urge you to keep your bathing suit on. Oh yeah, thong bikinis do not count as a bikini! Cover your goods please!

5.
Is it normal to use the restroom while on the phone?
I really don't need to hear you gabbing about your mother's ex hubby's son's cousin's former partner while there are smells permeating from the stall next to me. I only need to deal with one mini-crisis at a time, thank you.
6.
Is it normal to check yourself out when passing by a window/mirror?
I do it all of the time. No one wants to realize at the end of the day they had food in their teeth or a surprise was peeking out from their nose and nobody told them...

7.
Is it normal to keep folded laundry in the basket instead of putting it away?
I hate doing laundry...so yes. It's very normal.

8.
Is it normal to turn & walk the opposite direction when seeing someone you know in a store?
Nope. I am assuming if you even consider it, you must not like the person. I don't see too many people be lining it for the door when they see their best friend. However, if you read #3 you saw I am always put together...so why not flaunt what a wonderful life I have. I know...I am a b*tch.

9.
Is it normal to drink coffee/soda from a straw?
Soda, yes. Coffee, no.

10.
Is it normal to hover the toilet in a public restroom?
Ummm. yes. I don't need crabs, or scabies, or any other nasty creepy crawly thing that call a public crapper home. Yuck.

1 comment:

  1. I think it is totally normal to drive over the speed limit! And I'm really glad to see that somebody else admitted to catching a glance of yourself when walking past a mirror....I try not to, but it happens a lot lol!

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